Enjoy Destruction

In the past week, it’s been brought to my attention that some of you primates are concerned with what I’ve had to say in my blog. It seems to stir a smoldering fire of anger deep in the pit of your gut…Tell me you're "all shook up" because Elvis has NOT left the building! HAHA!! Good, good. Anger is what I want you to feel. It’s what I need you to be in touch with. I want it to scrape and claw at every internal organ of your body.

And on that note, I’d like to introduce this week’s installment of “Bach Kulo Khan’s Creators of Chaos” Award, which goes to CERN, the European Organization for Nuclear Research.


With 60 countries backing their $9 billion dollar project, CERN has created your world’s largest instrument, a 7,000-ton atom-smasher. This is what should really make your blood boil.

The atom-smasher, or LHC (Large Hadron Collider), was built by your puny scientist in a 17-mile tunnel that loops around in a ring some 500 feet below the French-Swiss border. Starting tomorrow, the same clueless scientists will fire proton beams out of this LHC counterclockwise around the ring, and then another clockwise. When these two beams collide, what they are hoping to do is discover “God’s Particle”, which they believe is what makes up the “dark matter” of the universe. HAHAHA. How blasphemous is that? HAHAhhahah.


When the beams collide head on, they will create fireballs and showers of subatomic debris never before seen by humans. They think the impact could produce man-made mini black holes and endanger Earth...I wish. If only it were all that easy.

Another hope is that the collision will reveal that the universe has extra dimensions, normally curled up tightly – Here’s a hint weaklings: there are other dimensions, but they aren’t curled up, that’s for sure. Hahaha. If only you knew how close the spiritual dimension is to you. Oh man, that tickles mah’ fancy…HAHAHAHA!!!

So go ahead CERNites, fire those proton beams at one another. When you reveal to mankind just how much you DON’T know about the universe and its makeup, will you then turn to your dear Bach Kulo Kahn for guidance?

I’ll be here, waiting in the shadows just behind you…HAHAahahaha!!

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